How to realise that expectations are unrealistic
According to psychologists’ observations, people with this kind of problem can talk about their experiences in this way:
I know it’s unfair, but I often expect my partner to read my mind.
Why do I feel disappointed every time a partner doesn’t meet my expectations?
Why do I find it hard to accept my partner for who they are?
If you have similar thoughts on a regular basis, it’s likely that you, like many others, are dealing with unrealistic expectations. They cause tension in a couple, but this can be overcome with a little effort and work on yourself.
One of the main reasons why unrealistic expectations can be so destructive is because they arise from unrealistic ideas about the relationship itself. For example, someone believes that feelings of loneliness and dissatisfaction will disappear forever once he or she finds a soul mate. And someone believes that he or she will never fight with his or her partner.
A distant view of relationships invariably leads to disappointment. When things don’t work out the way we imagined, it’s easy to blame our partner for not living up to our expectations and not being who we thought they were.
How to get rid of unrealistic expectations in a relationship
The first thing to do is to recognise when expectations diverge from reality and then take steps to correct them. Here are a few tactics to help you do that.
1- Communicate openly and honestly with your partner
American psychologists recently conducted a small study that provides a clear picture of the role of communication in romantic relationships. The authors studied 56 couples and found that partners with effective communication were much more satisfied with their union.
Open dialogue, where participants hear and respect each other’s opinions, is a great way to avoid unrealistic expectations. Therefore, keep sincerity and honesty in conversations with your partner, listen to his desires and be ready to compromise. This will save you from misunderstandings and unfulfilled hopes.
